bananas

This photograph of bananas is by Irving Penn for the August 2009 issue of Vogue.

I thought of it because I did a fruit fast for the last two days as part of the 40 days to Personal Revolution thing I am doing right now.  It is a program designed by Baron Baptiste, the yoga instructor, and I am doing it under the guidance of Marie Friedlander, my amazing yoga instructor at Yoga Shakti in Irvine.  The program involves committing to doing yoga and meditation every day for 40 days, engaging in self reflection questions each week, and paying attention to diet.  I was skeptical about the fruit fast (eating nothing but fruit for 3 days) and in truth, I didn't enjoy it very much.  I ended a day early, although I noticed that my insides felt strangely cool and clean while I was doing it.  I think the whole endeavor is pushing me to some kind of extreme edge, and I am feel like I am going to somehow collapse or surrender in a larger way because of it- like, finally give up the idea that I should be anyone or doing anything else than who I am and what I am doing right now.  That seems like a good thing, although it is strange that is takes so much to get me to this point.

I find this photograph fascinating as well as beautiful.  I remember reading about Irving Penn's creative process- he is a complete perfectionist and would hunt through hundreds of bananas for just the right ones, then do lots of work to create just the right slices and piles, etc etc.  This is interesting to me because my creative process is often spontaneous and somewhat haphazard.  I like to produce things quickly, with what I find around.  The process of writing my dissertation feels much more grueling than this kind of spontaneous creativity that I like, so I have been thinking a lot about discipline and creativity and how to marry those two things together in a way that retains my unique process and point of view.  Thinking about the discipline and dedication that went into creating this gorgeous photo gives me some inspiration to keep thinking, tinkering, playing, and arranging in a curious but focused way.